Ah, the end of the year. Time to make your resolutions or not...
How about not?
How about just asking yourself what are one or two things you have learned about yourself and the world this year?
I don’t want to make resolutions for the new year. I am tired of goals and plans because, in an odd way, it reinforces that concept that I can control things.
So, this is what I learned this year:
I can’t control things. Again, I can’t control things. Life is uncertain. That is just a fact.
This is a hard fact for me to swallow because I like believing I can control things. But, what I have learned is that there is a sense of relief in learning this fact once and for all.
If I really can’t control things, then expectations become silly. And, when those expectations become silly, life becomes extremely interesting. It fascinates me how oddly well life can turn out when you have no expectations of what “should” happen.
They say you can’t fight the waves, you should swim with them and not against them. I have been doing that and it’s not so bad. In fact, it’s pretty good. Nothing this year has turned out for me the way I thought it would. Some things were excruciating and painful, almost more than I could bear. Some things were wonderful beyond my wildest dreams. My only part in all of this was how I reacted to those things.
So, one of the things that I have learned is to take it easy and learn to swim with the waves and keep my eyes open for any and all opportunities for growth as a person.
The other thing I have learned is patience. Patience in how life works and how thinking you can plan out the path is an exercise in futility.
What I can do is have a vision for my life. I can have values and dreams about what means the most to me. I have had to examine those parts of my life that must exist. For me, that is love and friendship and, most importantly, making a difference for other people. Having a purpose and knowing what makes me feel alive has been key. How I get there and the way the journey winds along the way has been less in my control.
So, I would challenge you to not make resolutions for 2013, but think about what you have learned in 2012 and how you will incorporate it into the year ahead to make you the best person you can be.
Denise
entrenoususa@gmail.com
Happy New Year!
